My Work Product

  It occurred to me today that some of my blog readers may not see all the photos I post on Facebook, so its high time I post a few recent shots of the boys here.

  The first was taken sometime this summer when they were enjoying the new tire swing Daddy made for them.  I told them to give eachother eskimo kisses and they erupted in giggles.. hence this photo.  It now hangs on our living room wall and will forever remain one of my favorites.  The bath photo was taken this summer too, just before school began.  Their bubble bath is a ritual I often dread, but they enjoy so very much!   

  Thank you, Lord, for the closeness these precious boys share and the privilege of being their at-home Mommy every day!

The Library

It was shaping up to be a great evening and a very successful outing with my two boys, if such a thing is possible. I had devised a point system for keeping their behavior in check, tired of the old "I'm-gonna-call-your-daddy" routine, and was feeling quite proud of how well the system was working so far. Points, I had explained, would be awarded for good behavior and subtracted for unacceptable behavior, with "treats" to be bought at the dollar store on the way home at 50 cents a point. Tonight good behavior consisted of being quiet in the car, staying together, and most importantly using our whisper voices in the library.

The boys loved the new system, and each had earned two points already in the car. We rehearsed our whisper voices before we went in, holding hands. Quietly we perused the children's books, each choosing a few to take home, even discussing in whispered voices why we liked this one or that one. Now we just needed to pick out a few movies and we'd be on our way. Standing there in the movie aisle, Seth (6), who'd had one too many Fiber One muffins at snacktime, let slip a small, almost inaudible gas emission. Of course my three-year-old Dan heard it, stretched out his arm to point, and before I could get my hand over his mouth, announced loudly,

"HE FARTED!"

I fell to my knees, shushing him a minute too late, and tried my hardest not to laugh while I watched Seth walk away, pretending not to know us. My attempt to avoid laughing was useless, since the library's staff and all its patrons had now erupted in giggles. When Seth finally returned to my side, all he could say was "Please tell me he lost a point for that."

We quickly chose two movies and made our way to the check-out, where the librarian smiled gleefully at us, along with a host of patrons at the nearby computers. "Don't you just love the innocence of children?" she asked. "Love it," I said, ready to make our exit.

Walking out, I agreed to let Seth carry the books and Dan carry the movies, so my hands would be free to hold each of their hands. We made it as far as the library lobby before I felt our little train shifting to the right. I looked up to see a sign marked "Return Books Here" and watched helplessly as our beloved Daniel dropped both of our new movies down the slot.

Yes, we went back in, but this time without a trace of pride left. I just stood there laughing while Seth explained to the librarians what his brother had done. With movies back in hand, we moved our little train to the car once more, discussing the meaning of the word "incorrigible." They were good boys the rest of the evening, enjoyed their treats and went to bed without argument. They even earned points during bathtime and redeemed them for bedtime stories. Overall I think the new discipline system was a success--you just can't ask a small boy to ignore bodily noises. (Or book drops.)

You Might Be A Maxed Out Momma...

If you've ever eaten a spoonful of peanutbutter for dinner because you were too tired to actually chew...

If you've ever lost your cell phone WHILE you were talking on it...

If you've ever eaten dinner standing at the kitchen counter because if you sat down, you might never get up again...

If you've ever been driving on "auto-pilot" from sleep deprivation and suddenly realize you have no idea where you are...

If you've ever gone grocery shopping with your children, buckled them in and headed home, only to realize in the driveway that your groceries are still in the buggy at the store...

If you've ever eaten macaroni and cheese with a toddler spoon from a bowl with a suction cup on the bottom...

If you've ever sat awake in the silence for hours after the kids are in bed, just because it sounded so good...

If you've ever laid in bed with a growling stomach trying to remember if between the four meals you prepared, served and cleaned up this evening you actually ate anything...

If you've ever bought new socks for a member of the family, because you were too tired to do the laundry.....

If you're laughing because you've recently done any of the above.....you might be a maxed out momma in serious need of a vacation (without the kids).

Lessons Learned from SAHMhood

Its hard to believe its been nearly four years since I began my dreamjob. In celebration of the occasion, I pause to reflect on a few of the many lessons I've learned.

1. Life is just easier to manage with a little concealer and a good pair of shoes on.

2. Baby steps aren't just for babies. Sometimes I can't muster the strength to "clean the kitchen" or "tidy up the bedroom," but I can always manage to put away 3 cups, or hang 2 shirts. That first step is the most important.

3. The best prevention for child abuse is a good night's sleep for everyone. If naps can be arranged, so much the better. Cranky moms make for cranky kids, which leads to less fun for all.

4. Caffeine can give you a rush, as can taurine and ginseng, but you will inevitably come back down, usually in worse shape than you started. A much better rush comes from a good nights sleep, a nap or a brisk walk.

5. There is no mistake so big or bad that God can't make it alright. Even Mommy's make mistakes, and its good for kids to hear Mom say "I'm sorry."

6. Communication with God isn't optional-- its either going to happen the easy way, or the hard way.

7. When visiting the computer after the kids are in bed, always bring a kitchen timer and use it. The internet is a time-stealer from Satan himself.

8. Whether its the computer, TV or late-night housework.. take it easy on that morning girl-- she's you.

9. As the tongue goes, so goes the mind and body. To feel happy and healthy, speak happiness and health.

10. Even superwoman has limits. Its better for everyone if they are acknowledged.

12. When you lose the ability to laugh at yourself, its time for a mental vacation.

13. Caring for the caretaker is essential, not to mention the loving thing to do for the care receivers.

14. Sometimes you've got to put off the urgent to make time for the important. When you do so, its not procrastination, its balance.

15. When all else fails, put the kids in a bubble bath. If that doesn't help, put them to bed and put Mom in a bubble bath.

16. Do something you enjoy every day, before you forget what those things were.

17. It turns out cleanliness is not next to godliness after all. Simplicity is.

Just Keep Smiling... A Very Memorable "Vacation"

It wasn't until a few hours after we made it home, while picking up our puppy from the kennel and hearing myself recount our journey to the owner, that I suddenly saw the humor in it all.

"I'm glad to see you all made it home safely," she said.
"Well, actually, our truck broke down so we caught a ride home with family who were there."
"Oh," she said. "Well, its great that they had the extra room.. and I know you're glad you didn't have a dog with you."
"Actually, they had a german shepherd and a ferret with them. And a 9 month old baby."
"Wait a minute," she said. "You mean to tell me you just drove across the country with a preschooler, a toddler, an infant, a german shepherd and a ferret, and you're still smiling!?"
Laughing hysterically was more like it. (Emphasis on the hysterical.) We sounded like the Beverly Hillbillies!
"What else can I do? Sure beats crying!"
I didn't tell her that the oldest child had diarrhea, the middle child had pink eye, and I needed to see a dentist immediately. Some things are better left unsaid. "Besides," I decided to say instead, "the weather was great, and we're all alive." With a few more gray hairs maybe, but some very interesting memories.

P.S. - Did I mention my puppy was due to have surgery the following morning? Word to the wise: Never tell a two-year-old "Don't pick up the puppy.. he has stitches on his belly." This is a sure-fire way to ensure the child WILL immediately pick up the puppy to check out his stitches. Who needs reality TV when real life is this exciting?

Recently Heard at My House

Daniel:
- "Ma brudder Say-yuff is bee-yug!"
- "Mommy, I wuv Wukie da Skywalker puppy!"
- "Mommy, wook, Wuke got him name on him tag! It says Wa, Uke, Wuke!"
- "Mommy, I want to howd you, puh-weeze!"

Seth:
- Mom, when I get to heaven, will I have wings?
- Mom, can I be an inventor and a rock star, and just be a race car driver for a hobby?
- Mom, the reason you're sick is because your white blood cells are fighting a battle and if they can't do it by themselves you have to give them antivotigs to help them win .
- "Dear God, thank you for this day, I'm not scared cause you're with me, thanks for protecting me, thanks for everthing you made, the milky way, the galaxy, even the universe and all the cool stuff you put in them. Please help me to be a good boy tomorrow and please help my brother pay attention at church because he really needs Jesus. Amen."

A Random Observation

When I was a young woman, fresh out of college, with natural thick strawberry blonde hair, I purchased a dog. He was a perky energetic miniature dachshund with solid golden red non-shedding fur.

Now that I am thirty-something with two kids, I have discovered that my natural haircolor is something between brown and grey with patches of white, and mucher thinner than it once was. My dachshund now out of the picture, I recently purchased a new puppy. He is a pudgy, lazy rat terrier with white, brown and grey fur, a thin and rapidly shedding coat, who loves life, but would just as soon take a nap.

Coincidence?